An announcement today says that production of Tacoma Guitars will be moved from Tacoma to New Hartford, Conn.

"New Hartford Guitars" just doesn't have the same ring to it.

Personally, I don't think they'll sound as good without the Tacomaness in them.

Friday update: C.R. Roberts has some details on The Biz Buzz.

Saturday update: Here's the story in this morning's paper.

Have you heard the song "6th Avenue Stroll"? It sounds like a theme song to an '80s sitcom set in Tacoma.

In other words, it's perfect!

And for Sixth Avenue gossip, check out On6thAve.com. The latest? "Keep your eye on our local grocery store, 6th Ave Neighborhood Market (6th & Junett) … they’re going to be remodeled!"

He might have been the original Gritizen: Tacoma-born Richard Brautigan would have been 73 today.

Here's a Brautigan excerpt that NPR's The Writer's Almanac highlighted in honor of the day:

"The sun was like a huge 50-cent piece that someone had poured kerosene on and then had lit with a match, and said, 'Here, hold this while I go get a newspaper,' and put the coin in my hand, but never came back."

So in honor of Brautigan, feel free to offer your own surreal ending to the phrase "The sun was like ... "

(Not that any of us around here would remember what the sun was like)

A regular reader alerted me to this gem in the Seattle Weekly.

Apparently some neighbors in Magnolia have started a blog to share details on suspicious behavior after some break-ins in the area.

Now, I wouldn't make light of any crimes or victims of crime. But I can't help giggling over these blog excerpts, as reported in the Weekly.

• On 1/22, 8:30pm, we had a young white male with a green hooded sweatshirt knock on our door and ask if we would like to sign up for evironmental action support. He walks with a noticeable limp. It seemed really suspicious...I reported this to 911....

• I saw the same guy around 8:15 yesterday (1/22) on 24th as I was coming home. He was walking away from the neighbor's house after she told him to go away. He didn't come over to us, though I called 911 to report his description and location, and then promptly set my alarm as well.

• We had a young black female come to our house tonight at 8:30 asking us to sign up for some enviromental support group too! I thought it was an odd time to be ringing door bells and we were in the middle of eating pizza and watching American Idol, so I said "no thank you" and shut the door quickly. My 10 year old proceeded to turn on our alarm immediately!

• Last night 1/22/08 around 8:15 pm someone knocked on our door while we were watching American Idol. We weren't expecting anyone and didn't want to be disturbed so we didn't answer and they went away. I thought it was odd to have someone knock on our door at night time. I did not see the person. Today I get to work and my co-worker tells me about all the breakins in Magnolia....What do you think they are jotting down after the rest of you have opened up the door? Clues on how to break in?

I'm imagining what would happen if any of these folks visited our fair city for a day, what with its hoodie-wearing, reality TV-interrupting masses. I mean, there are hoodies at Starbucks, hoodies at Metro Mart, hoodies pushing baby strollers – and that's just between me, Cole and Niki.

(I'm also thinking about the 3.2 offers a day I turn down from legitimately skeezy dudes walking past my apartment building who all want "rides to the bus station.")

But I'll tell you one thing, Tacoma, if wearing a hoodie is wrong, I don't want to be right.

I leave any and all "American Idol" chatter to Laura. Laura, take it away.

As for you, my darlings, why don't you post your favorite hoodie-wearing gritty Tacomans in the comments field.

UPDATE: Cole's been looking for an excuse to share this pic of what he looks like after deadline. Rainier Beer, represent.

The 100th Monkey gathering is from 7:30 to 9:30 tonight at Jazzbones.

The 100th Turtle gathering is also tonight, at a random time and secret location of your choosing.

Which one will you be attending?

Funniest thing I've read all month:

What is "The Hundredth Turtle?"

Scientists studying box turtle behavior on an island observed that the turtles had virtually no interaction with each other (the exception being sex) and yet the colony flourished.

The scientists noticed that if you placed 100 turtles together in a pen, the turtles would stop at nothing to try and escape the company of the other turtles.

– Holistic Forge Works

If one were to cast an eye over my library of blog postings, one might deduce that I, lover of cupcakes, unicorns, kittens, puppies and ice cream, am a pacifist.

One would be correct.

But that doesn't mean pacifists don't lust after shooting computerized deer with a toy gun.

I'm talking Big Buck Hunter.

Pro.

The thought almost makes you want a cheeseburger, don't it?

Last time I played it was at some terrible Hollywood-themed minicasino in Shoreline. And Shoreline is scary.

I refuse to believe that I have to drive north of the T-dome to find Buck Hunter. Plus, my friends who love the thing more than me are on my case to find them one locally.

That's where you come in.

Where art the Buck?

As Kelly already mentioned, Elyse Umemoto ended up in third place in tonight's Miss America pageant. That means a $20,000 scholarship, so nothing to sneeze at, but she deserved the win. I think. I don't really know.

I have to admit, I immediately started rooting for her from her first appearance on stage. While most of the other contestants introduced themselves by saying something totally inane or goofy, Elyse was able to say something totally inane and goofy and still seem adorable. I consider that a valuable talent.

The show itself was constantly reminding us that Miss America is wildly different this year by being hip and now and on TLC and having a DJ (yes, a DJ). Fortunately, there was a back-up host that made it a little less lame (Clinton Kelly from What Not to Wear). He welcomed the booted-off contestants with a plate full of carbohydrates and sat with them on stage while gossiping about the remaining girls in the pageant.

Ultimately, the crown went to Miss Michigan. I didn't really see the appeal, but I'm no pageant expert. I do, however, think this is a good opportunity for us to name our first enemy of GritCity: Michigan. Down with the mitten!

And now, Miss Washington's money shot from the competition:

Photo by Jae C. Hong / The Associated Press

You're welcome. Now, if you'll excuse me, Paige Davis has returned to Trading Spaces. I'm swamped tonight.

Miss Washington Elyse Umemoto smiled her way to second runner-up tonight at the Miss America pageant.

I think that means third place.

I was at work and missed the Tacoma resident and PLU grad's appearance. Laura, I hope you were able to put down your beer and your Guitar Hero long enough to tune in and take notes.

Being the sort of girl who wore nothing but Osh Kosh overalls for the first five years of life, I'm woefully ill-equipped to write about a beauty pageant, but here's a picture of Elyse, left, and Miss Texas laughing at some other contestants doing push-ups.

I guess things have gotten a lot tougher in the pageant world since I was a kid.

Thanks to everybody who stopped by the Top of Tacoma last night. It was fun to match faces to screen names. I think I counted 14 of us at one point, including a certain state government official who didn't want to be included in any of the pictures (it wasn't the governor).

But my favorite thing about the event? One frequent Gritizen who couldn't make it sent her roommate, who had never even seen the blog, to get T-shirts. That's an awfully nice roommate!

Here's a mashup photo of some of the readers who showed up. The best T-shirt of the night wasn't the one we were giving out: Check out the historical "Tacoma Grand Prix" shirt from 1986. Classic.

GritCity T-shirts (Limited quantity - about 10 or 15. Let's say 12.)
When: 7:30 tonight
Where: Top of Tacoma bar, 3529 McKinley Ave.

And if you can't make it, here's the magic link to buy one.

Just how unknown was Heath Ledger at the time he danced on the steps at Stadium Bowl in his breakout role in "10 Things I Hate About You"?

On this photo in our archive, he's cited as "Patrick Ledget." (To be fair, his character is named Patrick, and, well, Ledger kind of looks like Ledget if you have bad handwriting.)

Most of the films shot in Tacoma, like "10 Things" and "The Hand That Rocks the Cradle," seem to pass off Tacoma as Seattle. And "Prefontaine" casts Tacoma as Eugene.

Is "I Love You to Death" the only movie that's been filmed in Tacoma that actually calls us Tacoma? I haven't seen it yet, but it seems worth watching since it was filmed here.

My all-time favorite image of Tacoma on the big screen comes in the closing credits of "10 Things I Hate About You." Forward to about 1:30 for the start of the music.

And it won't be the last time.

Thank you to everyone who weighed in.

Looks like we're on for a GritCity meet-and-drink. Me, Cole, Laura and Niki promise t-shirts for a lucky few, and inappropriate remarks for all.

When: 7:30 p.m. Friday
Where: Top of Tacoma, 3529 McKinley Ave.
Why: Because because because because because!

Be there or be somewhere else.

(But please come or we'll be lonely.)

First, please forgive me for not posting last week. I was sick and would have probably spewed too much cynicism and nasal drippings for anyone's liking.

Now that we've gotten the ugly out of the way, let's talk about the pretty.

Namely, Miss America.

Not sure if you've seen the commercials recently, but Miss America has been marketing itself this year as the original reality/talent competition. Before there was American Idol, there was Miss America, etc etc.

Work it! Photo by Sara Gettys, Yakima Herald-Republic

Sure, their sparkly commercials piqued my interest, but I wasn't actually planning on watching until I learned that a Tacoma resident, and PLU grad, will be in the competition.

Her name is Elyse Umemoto and she's enjoyed the titles of Miss Pierce County AND Miss Seattle AND Miss Washington. Figure that one out. But the best part - just look at all the history she could be making! From the Yakima Herald-Republic's story:

As the reigning Miss Washington, Umemoto will compete Saturday at the Planet Hollywood Resort and Casino in Las Vegas for the title of Miss America. If she wins, she could make pageant history.

Umemoto could be the first Miss Washington – and first former Miss Pierce County – to become Miss America. She also could be the first American Indian to wear the crown. And the first Hispanic. As well as the second Asian.

How many demographics can one person possibly fill?! Unbelievable. She should win some type of award for that alone.

The competition will air on TLC Saturday night (I bet the networks are kicking themselves for passing on this broadcast now that there aren't any writers). If you don't watch, the terrorists... well, you know.

Hey, guys-
Remember me? Well, I remember you and miss you all (most of you) very much.

To my great dismay, there have been no bills introduced in Olympia involving prostitutes and coffee shops. Yet. But I've been checking regularly and will keep you in-the-know.

But I'm having fun. I met some nice legislators and lobbyists. I also met a Pierce County politician who told me I looked like Nicolas Sarkozy's wife (I don't, but would it were so...).

I know Cole is mad his car was broken into, and I would be, too. But one thing that's wonderful about Tacoma is that nobody there asks me if I'm an intern, introduces me as an apprentice, inquires how long I've been "helping with this reporting thing," or says, "You remember Niki, she's the new assistant."

All in all, its good for my ego. I mean, how many more years could I be mistaken for an intern? (Twenty, if I play my cards right and everyone loses their vision.)

In closing, I look forward to seeing you all on Friday at either a bar or a coffee shop. It's time for me to go now.

Niki
P.S. Would it kill you to send me a frigging care package?

Hi friends.

We've been whinging** about these dang t-shirts for ages now, so let's get together Friday night and do something about it.

That's where you come in.

I know you have lives and babies and puppies to care for. So I say you all tell us what you'd prefer:

Option A: Bar night at Top of Tacoma this Friday. Cheap martinis and a good jukebox.
Option B: Coffee evening at one of our fine local establishments (TBA). Bring the fam.
Option C: Some combination thereof? A minibottle of Bailey's for your latte? Whatev.

We have about two handfuls of t-shirts to give away to the first folks who come Friday, and we're launching an online store so you can buy extras for your babies and your puppies.

So what say you, Tacoma? The lines are open.

** That's British for "whining." You can tell by the "g."

Here's an open letter to the bumbling crook who failed in his attempt to steal my car:

Dear Kind Sir (if you can read),

I'm sorry things didn't work out between you and my car. I hope you didn't get all upset inside. I'm not surprised that my car opened up like that for you, and you were able to gain entry on your first date, but it's really a letdown that you weren't capable of hanging in there long enough to seal the deal. Your significant other told me that's a problem for you.

Since we're talking, I also want to thank you for leaving behind a half-filled can of Tilt malt liquor energy drink. Anybody who can derive energy from malt liquor has my utmost respect.

Don't worry – I'm not going to give your fingerprints and your DNA to the police. Instead I'm going to keep it until it's scientifically and financially feasible to clone you. At that time, I'll lock you in my basement and force you to learn how to repair car windows, all while keeping you on a strict diet of Tilt malt liquor.

Until then, I'll keep my car unlocked so you can get some hot-wiring practice without shattering glass all over the street.

Hope to see you again soon,
Cole

If you haven't been to Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium in awhile, today would be a good time to go: It's free.

From the zoo, which is open until 4 p.m. today:
Visitors who live within the city limits of Tacoma will be admitted free on Friday, Jan. 18, 2008. Please bring proof of residency (current driver's license or utility bill).

People from Bellevue will have to pay double.*

*I made that part up, but it should be a standing rule for everything.

Sure, this week saw Esquire name Doyle's and the Parkway among the Best Bars in America, and The New York Times mentions Tacoma's Primo Grill.

But only one Tacoma resident made the front page of CNN.com and ABCNews.com this morning. Apparently, it's easy to get publicity when you have four legs and you're trapped on a cliff. Click here to watch.

And, as Gritizen Sheelah notes, it looks like the human made it out OK too.

Ed sent me this open call for musicians. It sounds like a fun idea.

Tacoma Acoustic Jam
Calling all weather-hearty musicians. Anyone who wants to play acoustic music outside meet Tuesday, January 22nd, at Point Defiance Park 12:00 noon. We will meet at the covered picnic area between "Never Never Land" and "Fort Nisqually". Bundle up, cut the fingers off your gloves, bring your axe and a propane heater if you have it. Let's see who shows up!

Here around the Grit office, we've been talking for a while about doing something like this to bring some life to Tollefson Plaza. Our version would probably include fewer real musicians and more garbage cans being played as drums. And Niki on the tambourine. Maybe this summer?

It's time for a caption contest!

The Air Force Thunderbirds are making a stop at McChord today, and this photo is featured on the stunt team's Web site.

Why is this guy hanging onto the side of a jet?
Do they always make him ride out there?
What's he pointing at?

If there were such a thing as "Tacoma Metropolitan" magazine, I would totally read that. Instead, I hate to admit that I was browsing through "Seattle Metropolitan" when I came across their list of recommended street signs "For Your Safety and Comfort."

One of the signs features a Tacoma icon, although, to me, this guy looks more like a Rastafarian pirate.

I'm thinking we need to come up with some Tacoma street signs specifically aimed at people who visit us from Seattle.

Saturday's winning Daily Game lottery numbers: 2-5-3.

And to think: All day Saturday I kept seeing that series of numbers pop up in my life – like every time I got a phone call from someone from the Greater Tacoma Area.

These exact same magic numbers were the winning Daily Game sequence just two months ago, the same day I saw that series of numbers scrawled in graffiti in my neighborhood.

It was like a message from God, if God supports gambling and uses Krylon.

I'm going to pick up the T-shirts RIGHT NOW (on my way to Dino Rossi & Chris Gregoire's respective campaign offices ... so I won't be back to update you until later).

So, who's getting one? Well, our loyalest readers will get these limited edition, free shirts. (So, not Rossi and Gregoire.) I'm not sure how we're distributing them, but we'll let you know as soon as we figure it out.

Yay.

UPDATE

Here's a smuggled photo of the mythical t-shirt. Pop quiz: Who's headless body is this?

I just returned from a week in Hawaii and wanted you all to know I thought about you fondly briefly while I was away.

Over the course of Hawaii's history, many countries have tried to claim the islands for themselves. So I thought I'd give it a try and acquire it for the GritCitizens. You know, because there's a lot of gritty sand there.

So you see, I imprinted our identity into the ground to let everyone know it's ours now...

...then the ocean washed away my proclamation. So I scowled and went back to my cabana to sip over-priced drinks with liquor and ice cream in them.

Today in SoundLife, you can learn how to make a great cup of tea.

Tonight at the Tacoma Dome, you can attend the World's Biggest Tea Party.

With ponies.

I can think of no better Wednesday. Especially if you're 4 years old, in age or spirit. If I had a little one to borrow for the show, dress in some variety of tulle, and get hopped up on Hello, Cupcakes and hot chocolate, life indeed would be sweet.

Instead I'll be at work, thinking of how my dear Dad humored me by judging my painstakingly put-together My Little Pony fashion shows. (Happy birthday, Dad!)

You can read more about the pony shindig here. Other bloggers are talking about ponies here.

I do.

Let's hang out.

Moreover, let's hang out, earn some red-wine mustaches, and learn the routine to this fine bit o' footwork brought to us by T-town's own Claude François Dance Troupe. (Tollefson Square would seem a fine venue.)

You didn't know we had a dance troupe devoted to a deceased French disco star, did you?

Voila le wiki:

Ambitious, Claude François moved to Paris, where there were many more opportunities to pursue his career. At the time, American Rock and Roll was taking hold in France and he took a job as part of a singing group in order to make a living. … In 1962 he recorded a cover version in French of an Everly Brothers song, "Made to Love" (aka Girls Girls Girls). Written by Phil Everly, it had been only a minor hit in America, but Claude François' rendition titled "Belles Belles Belles" rocked to the top of the French charts, selling close to two million copies and making him an overnight star.

In an e-mail to GritCity, the dancers wrote:

We are a group of Tacoma natives on a mission – a mission to spread joy, dancing and a love of the late French disco star Claude François throughout Tacoma and the world! Although we are scattered across the world (from London to Iowa), we reunite once a year in Tacoma to continue this important work. In order to further our mission, we are embarking on an online outreach campaign around our latest video in which we perform the funky dance moves from Claude François international hit "Cette année-là".

My favorite part is when a car drives through the routine and it gives me a little frisson of electricity – will the driver coast by, head bobbing, or even stop, leap into the back row and join the dance?

Oh là là. You will just have to watch.

p.s. Here's a croissant I ate once in Paris. It was good, damned good, as Hemingway is alleged to have said in relation to something French.

A friend and reader recently told me he gets all of his local news from this fine blog. Troubling? Mildly.

So the GritCity editorial department got together and formulated a plan: What if we started posting facts? Or, at the very least, dispatches from places where facts happen.

Here's how it's going to work: I'll be stationed in Olympia for the legislative session, posting said facts, along with findings and occasional secrets delivered to my office via dwarf carrier pigeons, to the Political Buzz blog.

The rest (shiny stuff, made up stuff, funny stuff) is all for you. Like, let's say someone introduces legislation that would make it legal for Hot Chick-a-Latte and the online prostitutes of Federal Way to open their joint venture: Scone Jobs ... clearly, I would give you a heads up.

These updates may not happen often -- or ever. But you'll sleep soundly knowing that someone you know knows what's going on.

Oh, and another detail that may help you sleep tighter: I promise the T-shirt details are on the way.

Throw away your Magic 8-Ball and deep-six your Cootie Catcher: Tacoma's first and only "holistic" cartoonist, RR Anderson, has developed a new way to answer all your profound existential queries – thanks to the prophetic genius of SolaRichard.

Ask a burning question, and Tacoma's world-famous sun-powered icon comes up with an insightful answer (after his eyes glow red).

Try it out here.

The fun phrases come from actual quotes made by SolaRichard.

How can you go wrong with sayings like:

"I'm too far ahead of my time."

and

"Bring white wine, maybe an appetizer, I'll tell you about my plan to light the Narrows bridge."

What are you going to ask?

Don't worry, you haven't missed anything.

A lot of publications do year-end round-up stories because it's an easy way to fill space with recycled content while everyone is on vacation. But even something like that seemed like too much work for a holiday, plus reporter Jason Hagey already did it for us. So here's a look back at some of our favorite pictures from GritCity in 2007:

=> Read more!